So, it's been a freakin' long time since I've basically done -anything- on deviantart, but here I am, back again, to tell people what's been going on with the Rex-dude. To explain, I'll go in a bulleted list format. GO GO BULLET LIST!

1) Since last summer, I've been battle massive discoveries involving my health and the future of my health. Basically, what I found out is that, naturally, I produce about 1/4 of what I'm supposed to when it comes to the entire endocrine system. Testosterone, Epinephrine, Norepinephrine, Seratonin, Dopamine, GABA, Thyroid Stimulating Hormone, and many others are basically non-existent in my system. In addition, my body literally rips itself apart, destroying its own connective tissue, and also it can't utilize fat at all, and lypolysis (the burning of fat into energy)can't happen. This has been a massive trial, and there's been a lot of blood tests and other tests done, but I think, finally, I've got some hope and have begun to start recovery. This is an extremely good thing, too, considering I'm a bodybuilder, and have been busting my ass to get a frame I can be proud of. In addition, I've also been having lower back problems, due to a rotation and locking of my pelvis on my sacrum, and this has also been a pain.

2)As I mentioned before, I've been bodybuilding a lot for the past 7 months or so, and finally, for the first time, I've decided that I'd like to share some of my progress with people. Lord knows I would never want to do this on facebook or something, but this seems like a good enough forum for people to tell me the truth on what they think, and show that, despite my own body being my worst enemy, I'm persevering and showing a little progress, if maybe only a very small amount. Thus, without further ado, I link to you my photo workout journal, which I've been keeping for a long time now, and which has various photos of myself for your perusal to see how I've been doing. There are the various albums on the left-hand side of the page, and honestly, for the first time, in August 09, I've begun to be really proud of myself.

[link]

Feel free to let me know what you think.

3) I've been doing capoeira a lot and have really begun to start finding my stride in that arena. It's a great time, and I love doing it. I just wish my back wasn't hurting so much all the time, and that I could do it to my fullest ability. I want to be able to use my uncanny flexibility.

4) Honestly, I've been battling something that has literally taught me so much about myself and about the world that it's taken me this long to understand it, and it happened, originally in February.

I fell in love.

This seems like it'd be great, and honestly, the feelings were great and continue to be great, despite my disdain that I can't seem to control my intoxication with this person.

The problem is that the person whom I fell in love with holds absolutely no reciprocal feelings for me, and never could. As such, my heart which I thought could never be that vulnerable to someone, got broken, and even now, 6 months later, I'm still reeling with the hurt of what happened and continues to happen every single time I lay eyes on this person. I can't help it, even the sight of this person's car or the mentioning of the person's name set my heart racing, despite the fact that I know that nothing would ever manifest itself and allow the feelings I have and hold, so close and so dear, to come to fruition.

It hurts... It honestly hurts more than any physical pain I've ever experienced, and even now, after once expressing my feelings to this person, I feel like I need to do it again, just to make sure that things haven't changed, and that it's still an exercise in futility. What can I do, though? I've fallen...

And I've fallen -damn hard-.

Despite having fallen in love though, I remain as pure as the driven snow. Interpret that as you will.

5) My degree continues onward in school, and soon, possibly in the summer of 2010, I will graduate with a Bachelors degree in Health Care Sciences: Sports Training and Conditioning. Physics this semester will be my bane, and I'm really really hoping that things turn out how I've planned. I've got extremely high hopes with it, though, and now, as I learn more and more, I'm considering possibly applying for grad school, possibly for Sports Nutrition.

My entire degree is absolutely fascinating. I've finally found something I like to study.

In the end, I'm doing pretty well. I hope to hear from you all soon, and I hope everyone's doing okay. Have a good one, lads and lasses. I'll try and update more often. Also, I've written two new stories for my gallery. Check them out!